Friday, March 18, 2016

I know, I know

Well as usual, I start something then ignore it and then come back to it again. In this case, it's this blog. While I had originally started this blog to have a place to show off my crochet creations, I thinks it might have become a bit more than that.

You see, I seem to be an 'almost' girl. That is that I always 'almost' manage to do something. I 'almost' manage to learn belly dancing, I 'almost' manage to complete an Open University module, I 'almost'  start singing again.

The reason is, I have a chronic illness, there is so much I want to do in life (see above for examples), but the moment I try to do one of the things that I dream of; the fibro kicks in and puts a stop to it.


But whilst I find it all incredibly frustrating, I have decided to focus instead on the small achievements, e.g. managing to hoover the house from top to bottom without stopping, managing to scrub the kitchen or bathroom, putting the washing away in one go.

I know these achievements may sound trivial, but when you live with a chronic illness, this list is majorly important as it means that I get to live in the real world for a while before the fatigue and pain causes me to curl up again.

Then there are the joyful achievements, being able to go see my boy play football, see my niece and nephew and be able to act likevthe daft, aunt that they love me to be. Or when you get to spent a few hours with a friend you have only ever spoken to online  before, and you get to see the real person and to embrace the joy you feel at finally being able to physically  spend a few hours in their company rather than  chat through social media or a recorded message on whatsapp.

So, instead of this being a post that is all 'woe is me' it has allowed me to work out for myself that, life isn't  about the huge achievements, but it's about the simple things that make me truly happy . So, if that means that I have to forgo a couple of major achievements in life to be truly happy with what I am grateful to accept, then so be it, and I think that it has made me a better person.

Just musing, but happy!!

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